Insert Double Character Development Here
by PrinceAladdin2
Summary: An ACMSES Fic. Collab with RedemptionWarrior. In order to take down a Stu, Willie and Kyle are dragged into the UAA and forced to ascend the ranks like so many before them. But as their minds clash, will they be able to do it without killing each other?
1. Entry

****Disclaimer: No More Heroes belongs to Grasshoper Manufacture and Suda51. Kyle belongs to RedemptionWarrior.

A/N: This is a story for the Anti-Cliche and Mary-Sue Elimination Society. If you are not a member, you will be completely lost, so I suggest either skipping this story or catching up on our C2. Not much else to say except that my co-author and I hope you enjoy!

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**Insert Double Character Development Here**

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**Chapter 1 - Introduction**

Kyle was feeling bored. It was a seemingly slow day for the Society and he was feeling the awesomeness withdrawal after a binge of Mobile Fighter G Gundam and Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann...again. Still, it was time for his shift in the Monitor Room, so he forced himself to sluggishly trudge over and do his job. After collapsing into one of the chairs, he pulled out his music maker to play something calming. He relaxed to the music, just letting the slowness of the day drag him along without resistance.

However, some minutes later, the computers picked up a Sue's signal and sounded the alert. Annoyed at the interruption, Kyle's attention honed in on his task. He shut the alert down and tracked the signal's location. With that figured out, he frowned at the readings he got. He opened a communication line to one of the leaders.

"Hey, Michael. I've got a Sue ranked at level 3. Who's available to take it?"

The response came back shortly, "Most of the rookies are out on training assignments. You'll have to get one of the more experienced Agents to do it. Let's see here."

As the Chief Agent looked over who could go, Willie sauntered into the Monitor Room. Kyle looked in his direction and blinked before turning back to his communicator.

"Michael, is Willie available to send?" The Agent looked a bit confused as the reply came.

"Yes, he's currently open for missions. Why, did he just enter the Monitor Room?"

"Yeah. I'll send him out ASAP." The conversation ended as Kyle hang up. He then turned to the new arrival, who had figured out what they had been talking about.

"There's a new Sue that's been detected?"

Kyle nodded. "How quickly can you get ready?"

"What's the Sue's level?" Willie asked.

"Currently, it's a level 3, but the readings seem to indicate that it's started to approach level 4." Kyle informed the fellow Agent.

"Is that all? I'll deal with it right now." The darker Agent scoffed as he headed into an open portal. Kyle blinked a bit before shrugging it off and keying the monitor's watch system to follow Willie. It wasn't long before his fellow Agent had found the Mary Sue. He commented to himself as he watched.

"What kind of weapon is that? Does she want to lose? Willie's not even taking her seriously. Whoa, what are his razors made out of? They cut that thing to pieces in a few strokes. She's panicking now...good, good, she surrendered. Wait...Willie, what are you..." Kyle got to watch as his fellow Agent incinerated the helpless Sue with his Hellfire.

The portal opened again and Willie stepped out of it like nothing happened. However, Kyle was now pissed for having witnessed that act of cruelty. He stood up from his chair and got in the other Agent's way.

"What the Hell, 'Hero'! She had surrendered! There was no excuse for that kind of merciless death!"

"No excuse? She was a Sue. No other excuse necessary." Willie replied, as calm and casual as you please.

Kyle's body tensed up, his hands curling into fists and his face took on an angry frown. And then he exploded with that anger. "That's your reasoning?! You're a psychopath!"

"Yeah, and I've been in this club for, what, years now, and you haven't realized this? What rock have you been living under, you self-righteous ass?" Willie then sighed and turned away, walking towards the door. He then swayed to the side to avoid the punch Kyle sent his way. He turned back and scoffed dismissively.

"Enhanced instincts, asshole. With all the rage coming out of you, I could see that punch coming a mile away. Anyway, what's the problem if I kill some soulless, worthless pieces of creative en-" Willie was then cut off by Kyle's other fist slamming into his face, sending him crashing into a wall. Kyle's music maker device activated from where it was left on the Monitor Room's computer. It was playing Travesty, a song from the final battle of No More Heroes 2.

"You hypocritical bastard. You could have ended up like that too, or have you honestly forgotten your own origins?" Kyle stated. No answer emerged from the cloud of smoke. "He couldn't be really so weak that I could take him out with one hit, could he?" The Agent wondered aloud, his frown changed slightly to a more thoughtful one. Like a bullet, a metal spike coated in flames shot out of the smoke. Kyle diverted its flight path with a simple flick of his head, sending it crashing into the wall to his right.

The smoke cleared, revealing Willie standing, mostly unharmed and with many more spikes surrounding him. "Alright, now you've made me angry." He flicked his arms forward, sending the spikes barreling towards Kyle. Said Agent just looked angry again as he raised both arms up with palms facing his now foe. The spikes diverted around him, plowing into the wall behind him. Willie paused for a second before renewing his attack from a different angle.

"Spikes couldn't do it, so how about this then?" He snapped his fingers, igniting a powerfully intense bonfire around Kyle. "Feeling the heat, you jackass?"

The fountain of flames mostly hid Kyle from sight for a few moments. However, a slight movement could be seen and then Kyle dispersed the fire with a wave of his arm. Willie got this look of realization as the Agent he faced started cracking his knuckles.

"Fire equals Thermal Energy...riiiiight." Like it was a cue, Kyle surged forward to try and slam a glowing fist into Willie's face. Said Agent slid out of the way with ease, countering by launching some of the wall's bricks. His opponent couldn't correct his posture quick enough to defend against them and got hurtled into the opposite wall. "Ha ha, you got stoned!"

He found Kyle right in his face, driving a jab into the left side of his torso. Willie had felt it coming, but Kyle's Accelerator was too fast for him to act on it. The jab was then followed up by Kyle spinning around Willie's side as he flinched from the blow and drove a kick into the back of Willie's knee on the same side. Incidentally, due to the increased speed, Kyle's blows had far greater power behind them. Anyway, as his opponent was slowly folding before his eyes while still charged up by his Accelerator, Kyle slammed both hands into Willie's back as open palms, launching him forward a little bit and skidding to a stop on his front.

As his use of Accelerator was making him hungry, Kyle stopped it with a sigh. However, when he did, a somewhat large dome of Metal covered Willie. Apparently to ward off physical blows, it was covered in spikes that were short enough to have no way around them, but long enough that contact would cause severe damage. Apparently, Willie was protecting himself until he got his second wind.

"Ow, damn it! Those blows hit like sledgehammers! That bastard, I'm really going to make him pay!" He slowly stood up, his outfit changing into larger black armor and a katana attached to his back. Then, with absolute deliberateness, Willie drew the enchanted blade from its sheath, flinching as it took its price of an ounce of his blood. "Kyle's the honorable and/or moral type. He'll try to break through my dome to get at me. When he does, I'll kill him with this."

However, he was underestimating Kyle's mood. Anger and Rage are good ways to ensure that Kyle won't show mercy on his opponent. In other words, if he gets pissed, don't count on Kyle fighting fair. Willie only got a couple seconds of warning as a powerful slam of feet and the sound and rumble of explosions headed his way as Kyle declared, "Blasting Quake."

"The ground?!" Willie expressed in surprise before he used magic to lift himself and the dome into the air. It only exposed him for a split second before he used more Metal to make his protection a full sphere. Using Air magic to not suffocate inside his barrier, Willie sighed with relief before he started ranting, "What the hell! I would have been vaporized by that attack! That asshole honestly just tried to kill me! I never knew he had it in him."

Kyle merely looked unimpressed at the floating spiked ball that protected Willie; however, before he could attempt to penetrate it to get at his foe, Tash came running in. She'd take one look at the floating Metal sphere and all the damage to the room before shouting.

"What the bloody hell is going on here?!" With one of the Leaders there, Kyle shook his head and took a deep breath to calm himself. Willie took a hesitant look outside his protection by opening it a crack. With Tash looking peeved and his opponent calming down, the darker Agent grumbled as his armor and katana disappeared.

"Damn it, I wasted an ounce of blood for nothing." He then spoke louder to say, "Kyle started it. He was getting in my face for doing my job."

"It's not your job to be a merciless psychopath! She surrendered, damn it!" Kyle spat back.

"Shut up, both of you!" Tash shouted in return. "I don't particularly care who started it or not because it's quite obvious that the two of you were going into this with intent to kill! Therefore, I am counting this as a strike on both your records."

"What?! But I was defending myself!" Willie exclaimed, his face red with indignation.

"And he killed a defenseless Sue! How is he not out yet?!" Kyle shouted in return.

"That's why he's getting the additional strike. Besides, he has two, you have one, and you were on the offensive first. Now then, my real reason for coming was to give you a mission Willie. There's a level 6 Stu in the No More Heroes fandom."

"Sweet," Willie replied, beginning to calm down. "I'll be able to go on a nice mook-based murder frenzy to get over this. Or am I not allowed to do that anymore?" he asked, sarcasm practically dripping from his lips.

Tash sighed. "You'll never change. But regardless, you're taking Kyle with you. No arguments."

Willie's eyes widened, and he began to sputter. "Wha-bu-but he tried to fucking kill me!"

"And he's a murderer! I can't work with him!" Kyle looked equally shocked.

"I said no arguments! Besides, considering Willie's…circumstances and the fact that you were justified, Kyle, I'm giving you both a second chance. If you two can actually get along AND accomplish this mission without killing the Stu, I might consider clearing your records. Now get going!" With that, Tash stormed out of the room, clouds of steam almost visible from the back of her head.

Willie looked at the door for a minute, and then sighed. "Well, might as well get this over with. The sooner we do this, the sooner I can get back to no-strikes. About time she thought about forgiving me for the head thing." Willie opened his Plothole Generator and activated it, opening the swirling vortex. He stepped partway in, then turned to Kyle. "You coming, jackass?"

Kyle stared at Willie's face, then muscled him aside as he entered the Plothole, not saying a word. As Willie followed suit, the Plothole closed behind them.

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

The sun rose on Santa Destroy, a town which had recently entered a new era of violence and insanity, much to the joy of the populace. Following the defeat of Rank 1 UAA assassin Travis Touchdown, the new Rank 1 immediately began a takeover of the UAA. All current members were stripped of their positions and either rehired as office workers or simply killed, allowing for a new, fresh crop of powerful assassins to take their place. With the matches televised, money was flowing in to the town like never before, all thanks to the mysterious challenger who had appeared out of nowhere. While most only knew him as Mr. Rank 1, those in the UAA knew him as Atticus Breakdown.

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

In the center plaza, near the defunct Pizza Batt headquarters, a swirling vortex of energy opened as a sullen Willie and Kyle walked out, saying nary a word to one another as the vortex closed behind them.

"All right, where is this Stu bastard? We need to get to him as quick as possible." Willie muttered under his breath, glancing around the area. Kyle looked at him with barely contained frustration.

"Why, so you can kill him as he squeals for mercy? Go right ahead. The Society would be a much better place without you murdering all over the place."

"Oh, go find a thesaurus. Hearing you say "murderer" and "psychopath" all the time is making me want to kill you, and I really don't need any more incentive to do so."

"Hmph. Go ahead and try."

"Are you tempting me? Why I ought to -"

"Gentlemen, please. How do you expect to defeat me if you can barely exchange two words?" a smooth voice asked, its dulcet tones washing over the Agents. They turned quickly, and knew instantly that they'd found their target.

The man behind them had long chestnut brown hair that descended to around mid-back. His tanned skin was smooth and unlined, and his purple eyes glittered with insight. He wore a suit of such immaculate whiteness that it seemed a second sun and a necklace of the purest gold. His half-open lips revealed the merest glimpse of pearly-white teeth. Even without the absurd number of descriptive adjectives in the previous few sentences, his identity was obvious.

Yes, even obvious to the Agents as they stood there while trying to shield their eyes from his suit's shine. Atticus Breakdown merely kept his smug grin as he continued speaking.

"Like my outfit? It makes it so easy to kill someone. Forcing them to shield their eyes and cower before I dispatch them. What a wonderful feeling." To anyone in the audience who hasn't figured it out, this guy's almost as psychotic as Willie.

Almost.

"Hey, you're the narrator! You're supposed to be impartial!" Said Agent snapped at me. By his side, Kyle shook his head and sighed.

"Great, two narrators for one story. At least we don't have to worry about the fourth wall here, it seems."

Atticus never lost his grin as he replied, "What fourth wall? Anyway, to prove yourselves worthy of dying by my hand, I offer a challenge to you."

Both Agents looked at him with expressions that promised him pain, lots and lots of pain. However, he merely shrugged it off by saying, "You wouldn't be the first ones that stain my suit with blood, although you two both probably have no idea on how hard it is to get blood stains out of white clothing. Anyway, the challenge is this. You will both enter into my United Association of Assassins..."

"That's United Assassins Association, you asshat!" Willie burst out while drawing his razors. He'd only get a warning of what almost happened to him when the clang of metal on metal rang out. A small, ornate throwing knife dropped to the ground and Kyle was standing in front of him.

"Well well. Seems your colleague here is the better fighter of you two. In any case, I'm the one running the show, so I can name it whatever I want. Now, if you've finished your childishness, I'll continue," The tone Atticus took with Willie was beyond condescending. Then, he cleared his throat. "As I was saying, you will both enter into my United Association of Assassins and share rank 11. Then, you will both work your way up to number 2. Once you've cleared that, then I will fight you. Deal?"

Kyle solemnly nodded his consent, the Stu clapping his hands together before Willie could give his input.

"Excellent! I'll be kind and arrange all the paper work! Oh, unlike that con artist Silvia, I am far more generous with whoever enters my UAA so no need for any entry fees!" He gave them a small bow before suddenly disappearing into thin air.

Willie was not happy, "What the hell, you pompous ass! I didn't even get to give my opinion on the matter!"

"And who just saved you from being impaled through the heart by a dagger?" Kyle countered without even turning around. "It's not like we had much choice. You would have tried to kill him, thus probably got one more mark on your record, AND I would have lost this chance to clear mine!"

"Then why didn't you try to fight him? You could keep up well enough, it looked like!" Willie yelled at his current partner.

"Because he's an assassin and wouldn't likely have hesitated to use you as either a shield or target practice in attempts to get through my defenses." Kyle stated in a matter of fact tone.

"Well, I don't have to like it," was what his fellow Agent grumbled as the truth of it sank in. With a sigh, he spoke up, "Argh, this sucks ass! I'm going to miss my Sailor Moon reruns!"

"That's your priority?" Kyle deadpanned. He shook his head before starting to walk away.

Willie called after him, "Hey, where are you going?!"

The other Agent replied over his shoulder, "To get a place to live until we're done with this bullcrap!"

Kyle was well down the street before Willie realized it and thus had to hurry to catch up. When he was about even paced with his fellow member of the Society, he started saying stuff out loud to cheer himself up.

"On the bright side, I'll be able to slaughter hundreds of mooks without mercy! After all, it's part of the game mechanics that you have to kill all the mooks before you can move on to the next part of the area. Oh, this is going to be so much fun!"

Interestingly, Kyle ignored his companion as they came upon a somewhat rundown two story motel. They could barely make out that it was called the "No More Heroes Motel". Upon reaching the front desk, Kyle started exchanging words with the clerk before pulling out his Paycard and handing it over. The process didn't take more than a few minutes before he was handed the keys to an apartment and his paycard. Thanking the clerk, Kyle gestured for Willie to follow him.

They headed up the stairs and spot the ever so helpful exclamation point that indicates where they're to live. Willie paused outside the door.

"Hey, I recognize this. If I'm not mistaken, this is the door to Travis's apartment!"

Kyle unlocked the door with a shrug and then opened it. Inside the apartment, it was obvious that someone had lived there and that no one had yet bothered to clear everything out. There were many luchador masks on the walls and several shelves and bookcases holding scale models of girls from a Show-within-a-Show anime. An open door to the left of the entrance showed a bedroom and to the left of that door was a bathroom. A light with three prongs, each with a lamp, hung over a comfy-looking red chair. Behind that and off to the right was a mini-fridge. There were signs of a cat having lived there, but the cat itself didn't appear to be.

"Well, we're here. Now, we should probably start planning-" Kyle began, only to be cut off by the sound of metal shattering glass. He turned, and saw Willie flicking what appeared to be nails at various points in the room, causing miniature glass shards to drop to the ground. "What are you doing?"

"Destroying the hidden cameras." Willie responded, his voice indifferent.

"And how did you know there were hidden cameras?"

Willie shot him a look. "If you're actually about to tell me you thought I was just a blood-crazy goofball, I will have lost all respect for you. Not saying much, but still."

Kyle gazed at him with a measuring stare, and then nodded. "I figured as much. So you guessed that Mr. Breakdown isn't as fair as he's claiming to be and used air manipulation to confirm it?"

Willie finished flicking the last of his nails at a point right above the bathroom door and nodded. "Yep. Now we should be good. So, do you have a plan in mind?"

"I do. The basic premise is this; we cannot work together as it stands."

"Agreed. So you want to split the fights so we see as little of each other as possible?"

"Exactly. We each get two fights and then switch off. You get 10 and 9, I'll get 8 and 7, and so on until we get to Atticus. Considering how powerful he is, we'll probably have to fight him together."

Willie sighed in resignation. "Fair enough. The less I have to see of you, the better. Speaking of that, dibs on the bed."

Kyle blinked at him. "Just when I begin to see your hidden depths, you pull something as childish as that?"

"Look, I'm a simple man, with simple needs. Blood, anime, and not sleeping on a place probably covered with records of Travis's porn viewing. There's no TV in the bedroom, so you're getting the chair."

"Correction, I'm getting the bed. You owe me for getting me a strike."

"Well you owe me for trying to kill me!"

"Because of you killing a helpless victim!"

"Oh, if you bring that up again I will-"

"Boys, boys, settle down," a calm voice rang out. It sounded like a woman, or perhaps a girl nearing womanhood, standing at the door. Willie shook his head in frustration.

"If I get cut off one more time, I swear heads will roll. Now who might you be?" he asked, turning around, before stopping dead. The girl standing at their door had blonde hair and blue eyes, an image of delicacy that matched the bizarre cross between a Gothic Lolita outfit and business suit she wore. No other description was necessary for her, as all present instantly recognized her as Margaret Moonlight.

Kyle stood, his eyebrows seemingly heading up to his hairline. "How did we not recognize her voice?"

"Too busy caught up in our own problems. But that doesn't answer the question of why are you here?" Willie responded, never taking his eyes off of the musical assassin.

Margaret's poise was undeterred. "I am your Fight Coordinator for the duration of your stay. Our marvelous leader, Atticus Breakdown, has sent his most loyal servant to watch over your journey."

Kyle blinked a few times, his breath coming hard and fast. "That bastard corrupted one of my favorite characters in the game? He'll pay for this."

Willie, on the other hand, looked thoughtful. "I'm not quite sure, actually. Hang on." Willie quickly strode over to the door, gently shoved Margaret over the threshold, and closed the door behind them. "It's alright, Miss Moonlight. There are no cameras in here."

Margaret's response was immediate. She let out a breath of relief and looked at the two gratefully. "Thank you. If I had to pretend to worship that philistine any longer I would have gone insane."

Kyle's breathing slowed as he processed the current development. "Wait, you were pretending to be converted? I figured that the first thing the Stu would have done would be to suppress the wills of all female characters."

Margaret nodded. "Normally that would be the case, but we're all aware of this place's lack of a Fourth Wall. Everyone who was not killed by him during his takeover merely feigns acceptance in order to avoid death."

"I see. Would you like to stay here, then?" Kyle asked. Willie gasped, and immediately began making X-shapes with his hands, something they both ignored.

The smile Margaret gave was truly beatific. "It would be my pleasure." No sooner were the words out of her mouth did Willie grab her by the shoulder and turned her to face him.

"Think about this for a minute! Just because he can't see into this apartment, he'll realize that you're staying here! He will find out that your subservience is an act, and if we fail, he will kill you! Are you willing to take that risk?"

Margaret looked him in the eye for a moment and then smiled once more. "I greatly appreciate the concern, but I have no fear of death. I assumed the façade of an adoring fan not to save my own life, but to take his. Almost a day ago, I realized it was worthless. Were it not for your arrival, I might have taken my own life. We all know that I am an assassin. There is either death or honor in my world, and I would gladly take the former to maintain the latter."

Willie looked at her for a moment, then sighed. "Well, you certainly are what you seem to be. Alright, I'll go make sure there are no cameras in the bedroom and bathroom for you." Willie then stalked off, leaving Margaret and Kyle, for all intents and purposes, alone in the room.

"Huh. Willie's actually accepting that you take the bed."

"I believe he respects me. Not so much you."

Kyle shook his head. "I can live without his respect. He's like Bad Girl, an unrepentant, sadistic psychopath!"

"Bad Girl had a lot of pain. Maybe he's not any different?"

Kyle looked at her, before looking down. "I saw some other aspects to him, but the end result's the same. He's just a psychopath."

Margaret shrugged. "Believe what you want. The two of you will have to work together at some point. Atticus is a monster."

"What makes you say that?"

"Because yesterday, I saw him butcher Alice Twilight."

Kyle's face took on a look of horror as he heard those words, almost failing to notice Willie walk back in. "You're all set," he said, offering Margaret his arm. "Allow me to show you your room."

"Thank you," she responded, "but no need for aid. I do believe I can walk on my own." With that, she made her way into the bedroom, closing the door behind her. Willie looked at Kyle, taken back by his horrified expression.

"What's wrong?"

"I'll paraphrase something from the movie Braveheart. 'The Author tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're screwed."


	2. Rank 10

Disclaimer: No More Heroes belongs to Grasshoper Manufacture and Suda51. Kyle belongs to RedemptionWarrior.

A/N: Apologies about the long wait between Chapters 1 and 2. We promise that it will not be repeated for the remaining chapters. But in the meantime, enjoy!

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_**Chapter 2**_

**RANK 10: Spegetti Cordon Bleu**

As dawn broke over the landscape of Santa Destroy, all was quiet at the No More Heroes Motel. Having few tenants to interrupt the morning calm, it seemed as though the silence would last forever. At least that was before a loud groan emerged from the only apartment with a glowing exclamation mark in front.

"God damn I hate mornings," Willie muttered, pushing himself off of the hard floor that had been his bed the previous night. Walking over to the bathroom, he sneaked an envious glance at his "partner" and the pillow and blanket he had pulled out of his Astral Vault. "Can't believe that prick didn't even think of packing more than one pillow. Why couldn't he just shove a bed in there while he was at it?" he continued, walking into the bathroom and splashing cold water on his face. Looking in the mirror, he noticed the dark circles under his eyes.

"Okay, one more crap night of sleep and I'm taking that bed, chivalry be damned. AND WHY AM I STILL TALKING TO MYSELF?!" he screamed, surprisingly failing to wake up his other two "guests." With more sighing, he turned away from the mirror. "Well, can't break those habits now. Especially since my Author is crap at dialogue or whatever…"

Willie stopped short, his eyes twitching, a look of melancholic anger stealing its way over his features. For a moment he just stood there, breathing hard, before rapidly turning toward the mini-fridge. Need alcohol fast, he thought, opening up the fridge to find…

"NOTHING? THERE"S NOTHING IN THIS GOD DAMN FRIDGE?!" Willie shouted, this time so loud that Kyle finally stirred.

"Shut up, you jerk. It's too early in the morning for me to hear you griping," The Agent groggily slurred as he turned to one side.

"Jerk? JERK!? YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WOULDN'T GIVE ME A FUCKING PILLOW LAST NIGHT!" Willie raged at Kyle.

"Ugh, so noisy. You didn't even ask properly or politely. You were just like, 'gimme, gimme, gimme'. In my family, you asked properly and politely or you didn't get anything." Kyle said as he was starting to shake off the sleepiness from having been woken up by an outside source.

"Real fucking fantastic for you and your family! However, it's not just lack of a decent night's sleep that's pissing me off. THERE'S NOTHING IN THE MINI-FRIDGE! NO FUCKING FOOD, NO FUCKING BOOZE, NOTHING!" The darker Agent roared at his companion on the floor. With a huff, Kyle banished the blanket and pillow back to his Astral Vault, revealing that he was only wearing some boxers.

"The fridge isn't stocked? They left everything else intact, but not the fridge stuff?" The Agent would wonder as he stood up. However, he'd pause as something Willie said registered in his mind. "No booze? Why are you looking to get drunk so early in the morning?"

"None of your fucking business." The Hellfire user groused. Kyle was getting dressed, putting on his black mission suit. When he was done, he reached into his Astral Vault for something.

"Willie, heads up!" With an underhanded toss, Kyle lobbed a bottle of something at his companion. Willie blinked and turned in confusion before reaching up to catch the bottle. Looking it over, Willie was very surprised at his fellow Agent.

"70 proof...Why are you carrying around whiskey in that Vault of yours?" The darker Agent said before opening it and taking a swig. He swished it around for a moment before deciding that it was good enough and swallowing the mouthful.

"Because alcohol has applications other than drinking the stuff," came the unhesitant reply. Kyle was now busy doing stretches, getting rid of the stiffness from sleeping on the floor.

"Right," came the reply, Willie polishing the bottle off quickly. As he did, the bedroom door opened and out came their Fight Coordinator, Margaret Moonlight. She looked a bit dishevelled, but still presentable.

"Is there anything to eat? I'd go for anything that could qualify as normal food. Atticus shut down all the pizza and burger establishments so he could put up more expensive 'fancy and refined' food places. Refined or not, there is a limit to the amount of caviar and foie gras one can eat before they go insane." Her face did start to look like she'd snap at any second.

Willie responded with a shake of his head, "Sorry, but there's nothing to eat in the mini-fridge. Strange how the food disappeared while Travis is dead, but all of his other junk isn't. So, if there's no normal food in town, what are we going to eat for breakfast?"

"Ahem. If you would both take these before they get cold..." Kyle got their attention, holding a disposable plate in each hand piled with scrambled eggs, silver dollar pancakes, bacon and sausage. They even had plastic forks and knives to use.

Margaret took hers immediately and without a word before digging in, while Willie wondered, "Do you have a personal kitchen and chef in that storage space of yours or something?!"

Kyle shook his head before pulling out a plate of his own, "No, I don't. I don't even know what would happen to a living being inside of my Astral Vault. It just has the property of being a stasis storage area. I don't have to worry about rust and maintenance while items are inside the Vault, plus food prepared and eaten hot will stay hot."

"Sounds convenient," Willie quipped before they both started eating. Since she started first, Margaret finished before the boys did. After tossing the plate and cutlery into the nearby trashcan, she went into the bathroom to tidy up. Just as Willie and Kyle finished their food, they heard a cellphone ring from the bathroom. After some quiet and brief words with whoever called her, Margaret came out.

"What was that all about?" Kyle asked, putting a last piece of sausage in his mouth. Margaret sighed as she sat down on the floor next to them.

"The Association just called me. Rank 10 is ready for you," she responded. Willie and Kyle shared a quick glance before Willie got up, taking the plates and utensils into the bathroom to dispose of.

"Where is he?" he asked as he re-emerged, his hands braced near his razors. His armor seemed to glow with anticipation of battle, matching the grin of excitement on his lips.

Margaret stared at him before letting out a small chuckle. "Well, aren't you an eager one? In any case, you'll find the entrance outside the Restaurant Bleu Respect, near the old Pizza Batt Headquarters."

"Wait, so this guy's a chef? Too good for his own restaurant, huh? Why isn't his arena there?" Willie asked, still with a grin on his face.

"It is, in a way. He resides in an Akashic Point." Margaret's response stopped Willie and Kyle cold. An Akashic Point was an area of Santa Destroy where the supernatural reigned supreme. Any opponent residing there was at least somewhat familiar with the magical arts, and was obviously a powerful contender. After the traditional few moments though, Willie's eyes lit up again.

"Well, nice to know I'll be fighting a fucking challenge for once. See you around Margaret, jackass." With that, Willie walked right out the door and slammed it behind him. Kyle and Margaret sat there in silence while they heard the sound of a motorcycle revving outside and then speeding off.

"So…does he even know where the headquarters is?" Margaret asked.

"Who cares?" Kyle responded, resuming his stretching. "There's only so far he can go before he either finds it or runs into a wall."

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

The wind raced past Willie's head, carrying with it the sweet sounds of Do You Want More. It had only taken a minor application of Wind Magic to play the song, and it really helped the feel of riding through Santa Destroy. As he looked around, he noticed the huge billboards posted on every building, each one advertising something about Mr. Man of Mystery, Rank 1. He scoffed to himself.

"Poser," he muttered, making a swift turn down an alleyway. His ride moved smooth as a dream, a fact which was at great contrast to its image. But he didn't care. Not by a long shot. The booze in his system had cleared out the thoughts of his prick of an Author, and all he needed to make his day complete was some blood on his razors.

"Be good to actually get some killing done without that self-righteous ass getting on my tits. Like he's never just killed someone for the sake of it," he continued, unable to shake the habit of thinking out loud. Just like his…Willie shook his head to clear those thoughts out before they could form. There was no point in dwelling on the past. All that mattered now was the present.

Speaking of the present, Willie noticed something that looked like a glowing star in front of a building around a mile or so down the road. Smirking, he applied the brakes to his ride, slowing it down with uncanny precision until he came to a stop directly in front of the star. Stepping off the bike, he walked towards the door, paying no heed as his ride collapsed behind him.

Looking up, Willie took in the sight before him. The restaurant, as its faded logo proclaimed, was as derelict as they come. The boxy building had walls gray with dust and neglect and broken windows, each one looking into a black room with a series of dowdy uncomfortable chairs. "Well, this place has seen better days," he stated, completely uncaring about the obviousness of the comment. He turned his attention back to the star, which was floating above a small circle of light.

"Guess that's what I need to step into to start this thing. Well, no time like the present!" Nothing more was said before Willie practically hopped into the circle, fading from sight as he did so.

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

All over Santa Destroy, TVs shifted, turning on or changing channel. Within a matter of moments, every set in the city had the same image; that of a brightly lit restaurant and a black clad figure. No one was surprised. After all, after several months, they were used to the live broadcasts of the Ranking Matches.

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

Blinking the light from his eyes, Willie surveyed his surroundings. He was standing in what appeared to be a renovated version of the Bleu Respect, as the massive neon sign above the bar claimed. The chairs were nicer, the floor was brightly colored, the windows were clear, and there was an open door to the right of the bar. Willie took a step forward, then stopped short as things that could only be described as giant walking steaks seemed to pop out of thin air.

Willie's eyes widened for, of course, a few moments before he facepalmed. "Why am I even surprised? It's a restaurant, he's obviously supernatural, of course I would be fighting food." Willie let out a sigh and was about to move when he spotted something out of the corner of his eye. Looking him, he saw what was unmistakably a camera pointed right at him.

"Huh. So Big Shot is actually showing these things live. Feeding his own ego, I bet. Well," Willie's eyes lit up with manic glee, "if it's a show he wants then it's a show he'll get!"

The humanoid shaped steaks let out challenging bellows like wild animals as opposed to any kind of thinking creature. They rushed the target that presented itself, Willie, only to be cut into chunks by several fancy swipes of his now battle ready razors. As he reassumed a normal stance, he scoffed.

"If that's all there is to these things, then this won't even be worth my time!" As he said this, a masculine voice with a French accent spoke up from somewhere.

"Sacre bleu, Nononononono! Stupid rebellious human souls! Steak is a main course! It does not go first! You have to whet ze appetite of ze customer! Let's take it from ze top with ze Appetizers!" The steakmen remains vanished and in their place were some very strange creatures. A few looked like large meatballs held together into a humanoid form while others looked like people stuck in club sandwiches. Some cocktail weenies with arms and legs filled out the current lineup, with Willie grinning for a moment.

"Yeah, sure. Try to whet my appetite. The audience wants a good show too!" With some fairly impractical but showy swings of his large razors, he began cutting through the food monsters in fluid strokes.

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

"Argh, that Spegetti guy is so lucky it's just Willie going after him! Such a waste of perfectly good food!" Kyle ground out through clenched teeth. He was sitting in Travis' chair in front of the TV, Margaret sitting beside him in a similar chair he had provided out of his Astral Vault.

"You aren't even concerned for the safety of your comrade?" The deadly damsel asked with little surprise in her tone, like she already knew the answer.

"Feh. Don't get me wrong, I greatly dislike the guy's methods and personality, but I've seen him fight and even skirmished with him a bit. He's got power and adaptability, making him not someone you want to mess with," As he said this, Willie was slowly making his way over to the next room while leaving piles of sliced food people behind. He seemed disappointed, probably because his victims weren't spurting into large showers of blood as he cut them up. Kyle continued, "However, have ways around his magic and there's not much left to worry about. Those razors of his lack real range and his speed's mostly at a normal human level, even if he's got instincts and senses that allow him to react faster than normal. They don't mean jack if you can't act on them quickly enough."

Over the airwaves, they'd hear Willie speak, "What the hell is this shit? These things are barely worth using my razors on! If they taste as bad as they fight, then the guy who made them is a terrible chef!"

The bellow of rage that his opponent projected, somehow, indicated that he had heard the comment and was not happy.

"YOU UNREFINED SON OF A BITCH! SPEGHETTI CORDON BLEU IS ZE HIGHEST RANKED CHEF IN ZE WORLD! SINCE YOU SHOW SUCH DISPLEASURE AT MY ENTREES, THEN LET US SEE HOW YOU LIKE ZE MAIN COURSE!"

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

Willie entered what looked like some kind of ball room with elegant table sets dotting the area. More of the steak guys from earlier showed up, though beefier than before. In addition, strange creatures joined their sides: large bat-like things that looked like they were made out of fruit salad and even larger beasts that looked like some kind of Frankenstein cross between a turkey, duck and chicken. The Agent took a swing at the nearest one, the razor impacting with a solid blow. However, it didn't go all the way through and ended up getting stuck in the steak creature's body.

There was a brief moment for him to register that, but the second it took to realize that it was stuck was all that the creature needed to punch him in the face. Willie let go of his stuck weapon reflexively as he staggered back a few steps from the impact. Taking a brief second to reorient himself, the Hellfire user monologued.

"Okay, they're stronger than before. I shouldn't have dropped my guard after insulting that Spegetti guy. However," a slightly manic grin crossed his face as he continued, "this just means I can let loose some more!"

With a snap of his fingers, the razor still embedded in the steakman's body suddenly exploded into a dozen huge blades to instantly slice the creature apart. It then returned to normal before zipping back to his empty hand. Then, before getting back into the fight, his razors ignited with black Hellfire.

"Stronger, but still pathetic," he said before twirling over to a pair of the bats and slashing at them. They flew over his blades, but still got caught in the black flames that surrounded them. The Hellfire spread over them quickly, reducing them to ash in mere moments.

"Not real smart of them to dodge my attack so closely. Do these things even have intelligence?" He continued like this, carving a path through the dining room with blade and flame. The creatures put up a fight, but they were simply outclassed in power. Even the fowl monsters revealing the ability to breathe strong blasts of fire didn't change the course of the battle; Willie merely used his magic to turn it against them.

"Big beasties breathing burning blasts. How cliché. All they did was give me more to kill them with." By the time he had reached the end of the room, the icon to proceed to the next area had appeared. "Weaksauce. For such a big 'Main Course', I'm not even full."

"FINE!" The pissed off chef spat from wherever he was, "If ze Appetizers and Main Courses weren't enough, I've got Desserts all prepared to tear you apart!"

"Just try it Frenchie! I'll enjoy the workout! It's not like those minions of yours are any threat to me!" Willie laughed back as he headed into the next room. Inside that room, however, Willie felt cold. For whatever reason, it was like a giant freezer, complete with ice on the ground and along the walls. Why it was connected directly to a dining room, he did not know.

He shivered for a second before using some Fire magic to heat himself up as he wondered out loud, "I wonder if he can change the layout of this restaurant. It would explain why this thing is right next to an eating area. Probably thought he could use the cold to slow me down."

As he finished speaking, the next batch of food monsters appeared. The first kind were humanoid giants, designed after the Yeti and made out of vanilla cake with coconut shavings as its "hair". The second kind looked like it was ripped right out of Final Fantasy as they were large flans of every color. Finally, the last kind were based on the stereotypical portrayal of Brynhildr as a fat valkyrie seen in The Ring of the Nibelung opera, looking like they were made out of fancy ice cream with their breast plates and helmets made out of the pointy kind of ice cream cone.

A few of the flans charged, but were stopped short by Willie using some nearby icicles to skewer them as they got close. However, when they showed signs of not being down for the count, he smirked before lighting them all up in the black flames of Hellfire.

"Okay, this will be good," He'd say before sweeping over to some Yetis. They were far more physically durable than the steakmen had been, the razors having no real effect other than getting stuck a couple inches in. However, unlike the last time, he wasn't suckerpunched before he used his magic to take them down. Whether this meant just lighting them up or morphing his razor into different forms to cut through them, it was clear the added difficulty was making him happy.

The ice cream valkyries charged with spears aimed at Willie. He'd sense them coming and dodge out of the way, letting them skewer some yetis before blasting them all with some more Hellfire. More charging flans were cut down and incinerated before many of the valkyries and yetis just tried to dogpile on top of him. It might have worked on someone else, but he just grinned manically as he unleashed a massive wave of his black flames. When they had died down, all that was left were melted piles of previously living desserts. Once that large group was gone, there were only a small handful of minions left to fight, much to Willie's disappointment.

With the feeling evident as he mopped the rest up, the icon appeared by a door that just had the ice covering it melt away. Stretching a little as he walked over to the door, he opened it and stepped through into a very intricate and elaborate kitchen. It was all automated by magic, as food was being made and dishes cleaned by ethereal hands. Willie heard the sounds of fury and grinding teeth coming from an elevated platform at the other end of the kitchen, with his target in plain sight.

Willie took one look at the overweight figure upon the platform and gave a derisive scoff. "You mean to tell me that you're my opponent? You miserable tub of lard has what it takes to be the tenth ranked assassin? You don't look like you could kill a sedated chicken."

"WHY DON'T YOU COME UP HERE AND SEE FOR YOURSELF!" the figure shrieked, his indistinct form shaking with rage. Shaking his head, Willie generated a cushion of Air Magic and drifted onto the platform, taking a good look at his opponent as he landed.

Despite his fatty features, the chef actually had a fairly decent looking face, with thin blonde hair and a stereotypical pointed goatee on his chin. His eyes, while beady, were an interesting shade of green, and his chef's uniform was almost as pristine as Atticus's suit. However, what really drew Willie's attention was the glowing cleaver clutched in his right hand.

"Wow. That's a powerful piece you got there, Spegetti. Did you make it yourself?" he asked, his eyes showing faint admiration.

"Zat's Chef Spegetti to you, you uncultured bastard! And yes, zis is my work. Culinary magic lends itself well to creation of other kinds, you know," the magician chef responded, pride clearly evident in his tubby features.

"I see. And does culinary magic also lend itself well to the fusing of human souls into your monstrosities?" Willie responded, his features shifting into a grimace of disgust. "I might be an unrepentant sociopath, but even I'm not that bad."

The chef gave a sly smirk to the black-armored magician. "What, my genius is too much for you to handle? You're just like my close-minded ex-colleagues, unwilling to take ze next step into ze grand world of perfect cuisine! Zey locked me away, but zey will see! I will have my vengeance!" he screamed, before being cut off by a tiny piece of metal shooting past his face, leaving a thin cut on his cheek. His eyes refocused on Willie, whose hand was still extended from the act of casting.

"No you won't, because I'm killing you right here and now. Let's get on with this, pig," Willie stated, his voice and his face a dead mask. Spegetti blinked before grinding his teeth.

"You dare…you dare DAMAGE ME?! YOU WILL PAY FOR YOUR INSOLENCE!" This declaration was immediately followed by Spegetti pulling what looked like flaming skewers from somewhere inside his outfit and tossing them at Willie, who casually dodged them.

"Seriously? If that's your best, then this should be no prob-" Willie began, before a rune-covered pot lid slammed into his face, almost knocking him off the platform. Spegetti laughed as Willie stumbled about, trying to remove the lid.

"You like zat? Ze skewers were merely a distraction, allowing me to place my Eternal Cover onto your face. You will never be able to remove it, allowing me to kill you at my leisure." The chef proceeded to walk over to Willie, his cleaver primed to lop off the confused and blinded magician's head.

However, as he got closer, he noticed that the lid was getting…redder? Realization dawned on his face as he leapt backwards, just in time to avoid the gout of flame that completely eradicated the Cover, one which faded to reveal Willie's grimacing face.

"Okay, I'll admit that was a nice one. However, you made two mistakes. One, your 'Eternal Cover' didn't prevent me from using magic. Two, you cut me off." Willie's razors flew into his hands as he took a battle stance. "I hate being cut off." With that, Willie charged towards Spegetti, his eyes utterly focused on the target. So focused, in fact, that he only registered that something was in the way when he came to a slamming halt against what felt like overcooked beef. Willie looked up and stared right into the face of the bipedal bull made entirely out of old meat that was standing in his way. "Please don't tell me you're one of those bosses."

Spegetti grinned at Willie as way of response, before being buoyed into the air by a flying cloud of what were apparently mashed potatoes. "So, you want to kill me? Better get past my Beefeater Gibsons first!"

"That's not even a beef dish, you fucking moron!" Willie yelled, before yelping as he hastily dodged the massive punch sent out by the Gibson. Rolling into a crouch, Willie took stock of the two additional Gibsons that had appeared to either side of the original, before grinning. "Well, this should only take a couple of seconds. HELLFIRE!" The instant the word left his lips, the ground beneath the three creatures erupted into pillars of black flame, engulfing them completely. "That was easy. Now then Chef Boy, fight like a man!"

"Why should I? You still have to get past my creations," Spegetti responded, his lips twisted into a massive smirk. Willie opened his mouth to respond, but instead it gaped as he saw the three creatures emerge from his Hellfire columns completely unharmed.

"Not even a singe…" he murmured, trying to process the sight before him. "You mean to tell me that you not only flame-proofed these things, but you made them immune to Hellfire as well?"

"Of course! I am not like any of zose pathetic creatures you have fought before. I plan ahead, and I make sure of my victory by any means necessary! And to that end," Spegetti stated as he pulled thin knives, each one covered with glowing symbols, from a pocket in his uniform, "I will not let my creations have all the fun!" With that, he tossed the knives down toward Willie's location.

With a quick movement, the Agent sidestepped the knives and turned to look at the chef. "So that's the kind of fighter you are, huh? That explains why you kept on monitoring the battle."

"Oui! With my magical power, making creatures to match your weaknesses is a piece of cake! And while zey keep you at bay, I'm free to rain my creations down upon you! Incidentally, be careful of ze knives! Zey may look zin, but one touch and you'll be short an arm!" Spegetti yelled down from his perch before tossing down more knives. Willie dodged from these with a roll, only to dodge the incoming fist of one of the Gibsons.

"I see. But if they're that sharp then…" Willie stated, pausing to grab a knife from the ground and toss it at the nearest Gibson. The blade passed through his head with no resistance and the creature fell off the platform, crashing into the ground below and remaining inert. "…they work just as well against your own creatures," he finished, smirking at the chef.

Spegetti stood there dazed as Willie made short work of the other two Gibsons, sending them to join their companion on the ground. Only after the last one fell did Spegetti react, gnashing his teeth together and leaping off his cloud, drawing his cleaver as he landed.

"You bastard! You zink you can get rid of me that easily! I can fight without my minions! And with zis Celestial Cleaver, I will make mincemeat of your head!" With that, Spegetti charged forward, yelling at the top of his lungs. As the chef came closer, Willie gave a manic grin.

"That's it. That's exactly what I was waiting for!" he yelled, twirling his razors in hand to block the approaching cleaver. Sparks shot out from where the two collided as the two entered into a blade clash, pulling in close to one another. After only a few moments, Willie overcame the chef and pushed him away, dazing him long enough to allow Willie to get in several slashes.

The chef screamed in pain as his pristine uniform was dotted with blood before righting himself and glaring at Willie. "You'll pay for zat. Celestial Slice!" Spegetti swung the cleaver, releasing a bright white arc of energy at Willie. With his ever-present smirk, Willie generated a shield of metal in front of him, one which stopped the arc cold.

"Huh? I expected more power from your finest creation. Anything else?" he responded, cockiness dripping from his tone.

Spegetti steamed for a moment, before bracing his cleaver again. "Eat zis!" He swung the cleaver again and again, releasing more and more blasts of energy, all of which Willie dodged.

"I guess that's seriously it then. Well, this Narrator isn't as good at doing fight scenes, so let's bring this to a close!" With that, Willie charged towards Spegetti, twisting and weaving through the energy blasts until he was right inside of Spegetti's range.

"What the-" he stated, before screaming as Willie sliced off his arm at the elbow with a razor, sending it and the Celestial Cleaver right off the edge.

"Now you know how that feels like!" Willie stated, before coming in close to Spegetti's face. "Now then chef, I have a question. Do you like your lard well-done or extra crispy?"

"Uh…well-done?" he responded hesitantly, sweat dripping down his face.

"Good!" Willie responded, giving a smile which only served to terrify the chef. "One well-done tub of lard coming right up!" With that, Willie snapped his fingers, an act which caused the chef to erupt into Hellfire. Screaming in agony, the man ran around the platform, attempting to put the flames out in any way possible, while Willie just stood there calmly. When, at last, Spegetti collapsed into a pile of ash, Willie turned to look at the camera.

"Hey UAA! Send me someone better the next time," he said simply, before turning and walking off the platform.

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

"About what I expected," Kyle said as he stood up and stretched. Margaret stood up as well, looking a bit distraught as the TV screen was showing something other than the fight's aftermath.

"The fight coordinators are responsible for cleaning up after the fights. But I'm not there right now. Is it just the crew I usually work with?"

Kyle merely shrugged, "Who knows. I wouldn't worry about it too much."

The female fighter gave him an aside glance, "You're underestimating Atticus? That's not a very smart idea."

"If it's a one on one fight, I could take him on easily. I can keep up with his speed, after all," The present agent merely stated matter-of-fact.

"You seem to put a lot of emphasis on how fast people can move," The singing assassin commented.

Another shrug from Kyle, "I suppose I do. After all, when it comes to the physical elements of a battle, speed is one of the most important. Power means nothing if you can't hit with it and defense can be bypassed. Of course, there are ways around speed too, but that usually requires tactics and is thus part of the mental elements of a battle."

Margaret lifted an eyebrow at the Agent, "So, you think yourself a master of combat?"

Kyle gave a brief little laugh, "Heh, I wish. I'm slowly killing myself just to keep up with the stronger members of the Society. Human bodies weren't designed to handle the kind of powers I wield. It's actually a wonder that I've lasted this long while using them." He'd shake his head to dispel the mood he now felt.

"Well, whatever. I'm going to go save my progress," He said as he walked into the bathroom and closed the door.

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

As soon as Willie landed on the floor below the platform, he was confronted by Atticus with two men in dark blue suits with big, strange machines on their backs. The white dressed Stu smiled upon seeing the dark Agent.

"Well done, Mr. Agent. You and your partner are now officially ranked 10th in the UAA's top ten. Expect a call for your next ranked fight within a week. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to handle clean up since apparently your fight coordinator couldn't be bothered to come do it herself. You can go back to the apartment you're using."

The dismissive tone clearly indicated how little the Stu thought of the ones trying to reach his rank.

"Yes sir, Mr. Asshole sir," Willie sarcastically agreed. Atticus either didn't hear him or didn't care as he didn't react to the barbed response. The Hellfire user frowned at the lack of reaction, but felt drained enough by the excursion to decide that picking a fight with the guy would be unwise. Instead, he left while muttering about things he'd like to do once he got the Stu at his mercy.

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

Two days later, Margaret received the information for Willie's next fight after lunch. Kyle didn't particularly care to stay and watch the fight this time, actually dressing up in his typical leisure wear of a loose t-shirt and sweatpants instead of his mission suit. He had been getting tired of staying in the apartment, so the previous day, he had asked Margaret if there was anywhere nearby where he could set up an area for forging. She had looked at his strangely, but directed him to the former lab of Dr. Naomi. The female scientist, responsible for making Travis's Beam Katana, had left it with most of the equipment still intact.

Kyle was wondering why she'd have done so, since he gauged the computers to be rather high quality, but he didn't find any signs of a struggle in the lab itself. Putting her out of his mind for now, he pulled what he needed for forging out of his Astral Vault and set up the area he needed. The lab was in a warehouse, meaning it by itself couldn't be used in the process he forged with. Instead, he set up a kind of roofed cubicle with enough room to do his work.

It had a small, mobile firepit in a corner opposite the entrance, an anvil for hammering and a small bench built into the wall so Kyle could sit as he worked instead of standing in the smallish area. However, he didn't immediately get a fire going to start working. Instead, he saw it as an incredible opportunity to use the computers in the lab to help him with making things. Once he booted the computer up and started the necessary programs, he paused a moment to determine what he'd make.

The process wasn't new to him. Forging's simple enough to understand that he could do it without anyone assisting him. Of course, this only applied to stuff that could be forged easily enough, as he left more complex equipment to the gearheads in the Society. He could learn, but that'd take a lot of time and he finds it easier to just rely on them while paying them favors in exchange. They can get expensive, but it's a far greater hassle to handle everything himself to the point where he has no real time to relax.

Anyway, a lot of his forging projects were for fun, making replica weaponry and armor that he thought looked cool. An idea struck him, a sword he liked that didn't see much use due to some arbitrary downsides in the game it's from. Using the computers, he quickly scaled out some blueprints of the weapon. A hilt and crossguard made of what looked like yellow metal and two blades facing away from each other, one smaller than the other while being connected by a few "bridges" in the metal. Since it was used by a kid in-game, he scaled it up for an adult to use.

Once it was to his liking, Kyle pulled some wood out of Astral Vault to start prepping the firepit. He'd grin for a second as he pulled out a bottle of 160 proof alcohol to use in starting the fire, remembering Willie wanting an alcoholic drink from the other day. Shaking his head to clear it, he lit up the firepit before sitting down on the bench to let it warm up. He could have used other heat sources, but this was quick, easy and could be done in any small enough space.

When the fire was to his liking, Kyle focused on it while also pulling out the metal he'd be forging with. The heat in the air was drawn to him, his body absorbing it before converting it to his needs. He compressed it into his hands, a strong burning sensation underneath his skin before infusing it into the metal he still held. Once wasn't enough, however, so he repeated it several times over the next few minutes until the stored up heat turned the metal red.

Setting it on the anvil, he concentrated on the metal, reaching a hand over it and sending kinetic energy into the blade. There was the sound of sparks as the shape he wanted the blade carved itself into the steel through the combined energy until the excess pieces split off. With a thought, the pieces disappeared into his Astral Vault before he concentrated once more. The initial dosage of heat had dissipated through the cutting, so Kyle drew in more from the fire nearby to once again make the steel hot enough to work with.

Now that he had the shape he wanted, he got a smithing hammer out of his Vault. Hefting it for a moment, he took a breath before bringing it down on the hot metal. Sparks flew as he pounded the steel down to the point where it could hold an edge. Every time the metal lost its red color as he worked, Kyle drew more heat from the fire to keep it soft. He didn't worry too much about chipping from the hammering, as he used more kinetic energy to guide the force of the blows. Once that was done, he wiped a hand across his forehead before setting the hammer down and allowing the metal to cool.

Then came the next part, making the hilt. Extinguishing the fire by drawing out all of the heat, Kyle got up and stretched before heading over to the computers to check on the design again. With them in mind, he pulled out the material he needed to make molding. Channelling some energy into the material, he infused it with his will to carve out the pattern he needed. Since he was planning to use different metals in making the hilt, Kyle was designing the mould to produce a small base on which he could put the other metals on top of.

This part was a bit trickier, as he needed to liquefy the metal to set it in the mould. That not only required a lot more heat, but also something that could hold liquid metal. Well, he'd done this before, so he had the equipment he needed. Trickier, but still routine. People would wonder why Kyle simply did not levitate the metal while it was liquid: the answer was that it took far too much energy and effort to do that practically.

Kyle trooped back over to his forging cubicle and started the fire up again, adding some more fuel to it. After sitting down on the bench, he pulled out what looked like a stone cup, which he filled with some metal scrap from his Vault. This time, he didn't immediately infuse the metal with the thermal energy he took from the fire. Instead, he let it build up inside the hand holding the cup over a few minutes, compressing the heat into a single point. He transferred the heat to the metal once he felt that the temperature was right, causing it to quickly redden and melt into slag.

Satisfied with the amount of liquid, Kyle poured it into the mould he made earlier. Once it was filled, he concentrated for a moment before drawing all of the heat out of it again. However, he still had more to do as there were other parts of the hilt to make as well. He got out the hilt base from the mould before storing the mould away and replacing it with a different one. Because of the sword's hilt design, the mould he got from his Vault was for different sizes and thicknesses of rings.

Filling the forging cup with more metal scrap to metal, he repeated the earlier process to melt it before pouring it into the desired ring moulds. Removing the heat to instantly cool the metal into a solid, he'd then take the rings out and slide them into place on the hilt base. Kyle extinguished the fire once more while deciding that he had enough thermal energy to finish the process without another one. That's when he went over to check his specs once more.

He was almost done; all he needed was to finish the crossguard and cap the pommel. So, after making moulds for those parts, he sat back down on the bench to continue the forging. Some more metal melting later, he started with the crossguard's molding. He was really thankful that he could pull the heat out of the metal after pouring it into the mould, since it vastly sped up the process. So, Kyle smiled slightly as he applied the pieces to the crossguard.

Now, he didn't really need the pommel to hold the rings and such on, as he just used some more thermal energy to fuse them to the metal base. However, he wanted it to look as authentic as possible. So, once more, he repeated the metal melting process to make the pommel and again, drained the heat out of it. After fusing the last piece of the hilt into place, he took the blade he had created earlier and made the final connection. With a satisfied grin on his face, he returned everything to his Astral Vault before holding the new sword up for inspection.

"This is marvelous! I actually think it's one of my better replicas. A perfectly and properly forged Razor Sword. Now, I just have to give it a trial run!" Kyle said in awe as he turned it this way and that. He'd look over at the computer system all set up and thought to himself.

"It'd be a waste to just leave them here, right? I mean, no one else has been here to use them in a long time, right?" Not really thinking that he might be under watch by the Monitor Room or anyone else, he quickly opened holes into his Astral Vault and let the computers sink into them. Room now clear of anything he considered important, he started setting up targets to use his new sword on.

However, since he felt alone, he decided that he could let go for once. So, he walked to the other side of the warehouse, away from where he had set up the targets. With the space he had, he started speaking even though it was mostly meaningless for what he was doing.

"I, Kyle, now call upon my connection to the Skies above and Earth below to forge the area of my Energy, Ground Seal!" As he spoke, glowing lines of energy surged out from under his feet to start drawing intricate patterns and symbols on the ground around him in a circle. "Cleanse this ground so that the pure powers of the universe shall flow freely through the Seal! Open my mind's eye to the truth of the cosmos and all that is real! Now come, Power of the Universe! Fill this vessel with your endless energy!"

The glowing lines finished drawing the elaborate rune circle around the Society's Agent as he stopped speaking. With whipping wind, the seal he stood on rapidly absorbed nearby energy from the air and ground: its glow getting stronger as it filled up. Once the Ground Seal stopped taking in energy, it started shrinking as Kyle drew the energy into himself. All told, it took somewhere around 5 minutes from the creation of the seal to the reabsorbing of it.

Kyle was familiar with the sensations: the painful yet incredible rush as the mass of energy surged up his legs, his muscles flexing instinctively at the feeling. Then, it'd leave his legs and compact into his chest, leaving him a bit short of breath as he fought to contain it. As he held it inside of him, he compressed it until he could send it as a lump down his sword arm. It was a pain he was all too used to, a pressure that wouldn't stop until he had used the energy. Then, once it reached his hand, he pushed it out of his flesh and into the hilt of his new sword.

The metal absorbed it easily, transferring to the blade on command and turning it a deep glowing red. Straightening himself out, he glared at the targets before disappearing in an onrushing blur with a yell.

"Edge Strike Nova!" He shot through the open space between the group of dummies he had set up, the blade passing through them with ease as everything above the cut flew up into the air with a red hot glow along the areas. Once he stopped, reappearing to the naked eye, he stood up in a relaxed position before snapping the fingers of his unoccupied hand, "Ignite!"

All the halves of the target dummies immediately exploded into balls of white hot fire, blowing out all of the warehouse's windows. When the smoke cleared and everything settled down, Kyle was left standing in a scorched but still mostly intact warehouse.

He coughed for few moments before turning around to survey the damage. Upon realizing the extent of his cutting loose, he thought out loud in an embarrassed voice.

"I think I overdid it a bit there...Well, it's still standing and it'll all reset once we leave anyway, so no harm done...right?"

From behind him, the sudden sound of metallic clapping reached his ears. Then, as he turned around, a vaguely familiar yet unfamiliar voice spoke up.

"Bravo, what an incredible display of power." Leaning against the wall behind Kyle was a rather strange humanoid figure. Kyle thought his mission suit was form concealing; this guy was completely covered from head to toe in pure white plate armor with a matching, flowing cape and sword on his hip to finish the image. There was no indication at all that a person was even inside the full metal body.

Kyle took up a guard position as he stared suspiciously at the new figure, "Who are you and why do you look like a knock-off of Alphonse Elric?"

The armored person faltered a bit, having just pushed off the wall. Recovering his stance and attempting to recover some dignity, he clears his throat and speaks.

"No need for any hostilities. I just came because I have a request for you. You see, I am Willie's Author." Kyle blinked a few times in surprise and relaxed a bit, but he was still obviously wary. After a moment of silence, the Author continued as he pulled out a group of papers, "Anyway, I have something I want you to forge for me. Will you be able to do?"

He'd approach Kyle and hand the papers over. For his part, the Agent looked through the papers seriously. As he did, he muttered to himself.

"Hmm...This is an interesting design...that part will be tricky...well balanced offense and defense...you even thought to include the ratio of Creative Elements you want for this...Certainly not going to be a quick job, nor an easy one." He looked up at the armored figure and asked, "I assume you also have payment ready for this?"

The Author nodded, pulling a bag out from somewhere and holding it open for Kyle to see the contents therein. "Will this suffice?"

Kyle's eyebrows shot up at the sight, but then schooled his features and replied, "Alright, you've got yourself a deal. I can start on the base work today. When do you want it done?"

"If at all possible, well before you confront Atticus." The armored person said as he started fading away. "You'll receive your payment on the day it's delivered."

When he was gone, Kyle frowned a bit but shrugged it off with a stretch. He had to set up his workspace again to start the forging process for a weapon similar to the original Omni-weapon.

**-Anti-Cliché and Mary-Sue Elimination Society-**

At the same time, another Kyle was standing amidst a starry void, looking straight at the armored figure. In an instant, a light flashed in the helmet. "The deed is done. Are you sure it was a good idea to reveal my identity to him?" he stated, a hint of frustration in his voice.

"You're just upset that you weren't able to pull the mysterious identity thing. Don't worry, he won't tell a soul. He is me after all," the other Kyle replied, a bit of a grin on his face.

"Not for very much longer," the armored figure replied, causing a frown to emerge on his partner's face. "You are sure that this is the proper course of action, right?"

"I should be the one asking you that. I'm on good terms with Kyle; hell, I am Kyle. But not only are you clearly not Willie, he hates your guts. How do you think he's going to take this?" he replied, prompting a sigh from the armored Author.

"That doesn't matter. I'm going ahead with this anyway. You with me?" he asked, to which the other Kyle smirked.

"I've gone this far. What do you think?" At that reply, the armored man gave the impression of a smirk, before both figures vanished, leaving the echo of their words as the only sign that they ever were there.


End file.
